Question: I can feel the “me” dropping away by practicing your technique of non-verbal communication. This seems to be creating major ripples in my relationships. Why?

Our closest relationships are often the relationships that have been in our life the longest-mother and father, wife and children, etc. These relationships are built on the foundation of predictability over many years of conditioning.

When you are silent, from an outside point of view; you are unrecognizable. This is very disturbing to those who have always “known” you. It is the you that they “know”-your likes and dislikes, your expectations, prejudices, irritations, demands, moods, responses, opinions, etc. If the attributes of the me start dropping away, this can be very uncomfortable for someone who only knows how to relate through predictable mind based activity.

Explain in a letter, or text, etc; what kind of practice you are doing. If your loved ones are interested then they may ask more questions. If they are not interested, continue to communicate non-verbally through touch and gentle facial expressions. Do not engage a hostile ego, but allow for space. It takes alot of discipline and courage to remain silent during these engagements as you will see your own ego wanting to panic and get involved-as it despises this sense of intense aloneness. Understand that your silence creates a crisis for them and you; and it going to take time to adjust. Nevertheless, healing is on its way; as silence speeds up the process considerably.

Some relationships will naturally dissolve while others will blossom. Here is a conversation that will help illustrate the meaning of your silence:

Why are you so silent?

Only Love exists in silence.

How is that true?

Think of a cat or dog. They are so easily lovable because they do not engage the speaking mind. This is a non-verbal relationship where ego is secondary and Love is primary.

There is not aloofness but real joy when you walk into your house and see your puppy.  Only in the absence of the me based verbal relationship can Love flourish; and the fear and conditioning finally vanish.


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